Thursday, June 01, 2006

What Do You See?

When you look at me, what do you see?

Do you see skin you wish to touch
A hand you wish to hold
Lips to kiss
A body to press up against

Do you see eyes into which you wish to gaze
To see the soul inside
To watch laughter ripple
And sorrow melt away

Do you see this soul which loves you
The person deep inside
The one that thinks and hurts and loves
That lives there day to day

Do you see someone you want to spend
Forever getting to know
Sharing lives, sharing love
Sharing this family around us which grows

Or do you only see a conquest
Another notch to earn
One more goal on a path to nothing
That you can strip then toss and burn

Perhaps you see a duty
Not abhorrent but not your desire
You care only enough not to leave me out
Because someone else in your life cares more

Well I don't want to be a duty
A chore to cross of a list
I don't want to be third or fourth choice
When you're counting opportunities you might miss

And I'm not a path to nothing
I'm not something you should use
I'm here because I love you
Noone else, Nothing less... you

You are not a path to somewhere else
You are something all yourself
Something strong and strange and wonderful
Someone worth all the love and respect you can earn

You have grown so far in my esteem
In the time I've known you thus
A person in your own right
A soul worthy of respect... and trust

And yet the more I learn to know you
I see this child lying deep inside
Scarred, scared and frightened
Rebellious, defending its shredded pride

Children can be cruel sometimes
They think only of themselves in the world
Of how much of this or how much of that
They can beg borrow steal and hoard

And when they're thinking of themselves
There's no room for anyone else
No gracious sacrifice, no giving of self
Nor helping others in your life balance that for which they yearn

And none either of the joy
That comes in sharing with the ones you love
None of the deepest pride in knowing
You make a difference, you are whole, you are loved

The waters that run are in you and of you
But not all & only you - It's a system that needs support
It needs all of us here to balance it
Damage one, damage all... that's how it works

I'm not playing some little game
Of he has her she has him its my turn
Nor do I want to steal you
From other loves in their turn

I don't want to be part of petty little
small-natured selfish things
I don't want to fail to care for the others
Who share our time and our lives and our schemes

You are strong and you are intelligent
You are handsome and you are brave
You have heart and soul and patience
You are tender and fierce and yet you play

You have become so many marvelous things
As you've journeyed from child to adult
The choices you've made have tempered you
Into someone worthy of far more than simple lust

I want a love that is bigger
that gives as well as receives
You've shown me a glimpse of something marvelous
That I thought existed only in books & dreams

And I'm willing to set my feet upon
This strange path which before us lies
But before I go
I need to know

When you look at me,
What is it you want?
What is it you need?
What is it exactly, my friend..
That You see?

~~ Sierra Jacobus, 06/01/2006


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